


Mass Effect: The Movie

by AnotherShotofBourbon



Category: Mass Effect
Genre: F/F, after the events of the game someone makes a movie, we will be discussing canon character deaths so just be warned
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-14
Updated: 2015-05-18
Packaged: 2018-03-30 13:50:49
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 5,382
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3939190
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AnotherShotofBourbon/pseuds/AnotherShotofBourbon
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Five years after the Reaper War, Commander Jane Shepard finally relents to requests to make a movie series about the events of her life. What follows is a collection of interviews with the cast and crew of the Shepard movies as well as the reactions of the woman herself on seeing herself on the big screen.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Interview with Jane Hale

**Author's Note:**

> It seems inevitable that someone would want to make a Shepard movie, doesn't it? So this was the idea I've had for a very long time about how it would go. There'll be a couple of OC-actor people, just fyi.

[From the _Shepard: Spectre Limited Collector’s Edition_ Behind-the-Scenes Features: An Extended Interview with Star Jane Hale]

Interviewer: So what was it like when you were told that you were cast as the Commander Shepard?

J. Hale: Oh man, it was the greatest feeling in the world and then a second later there was this absolutely massive weight that came crashing down. I was going to play the single most famous and powerful woman in the entire universe. And somehow this spacer kid had to do it justice.

Interviewer: Was it difficult for you to fill the role of Commander Shepard?

JH: Yes, god yes.

I: What was the hardest part about being Commander Shepard on screen?

JH: Besides the insane physical training? I mean I fought the Reapers, I doubt anyone who is alive now could say that they didn’t. So I was in shape still when the job offer came to me. When I saw the training schedule I almost passed out right then and there. During the war I did some of the unsanctioned N7 missions, nothing terribly flashy or important, just some fighting Collectors and the like. I actually thought that I was fit at the time. But Commander Shepard… *whistles* like everything else she’s on a whole ‘nother level. However, that wasn’t even the hard part, oh no. The hard part was trying to capture her… essence. If you’ve never seen her in person, not fighting, it is a hard thing to capture or even really to describe. She can so easily draw in the attention and focus of everybody in the room if she wants to, but at the same time she doesn’t draw it to herself unnecessarily. When she does though… it seems like everything else in the room goes dull and out of focus. I mean Shepard radiates this confidence and power that I haven’t seen anyone have without a massive amount of ego. But Shepard doesn’t have that ego, not a drop of it. She’s… effortless. Trying to copy that, trying to bring that to life… that was impossible. I still don’t think I managed to get even a fraction of it. *shrugs and is silent for a second* I mean at least we have the same first name so… I got that going for me.

I: What did you think when you got the script for the first movie?

JH: I read the whole thing in one night. Everyone heard the stories of what Shepard accomplished as a Spectre, but to read this script made it seem like fiction. There were so many times that I was certain people where going to lose their lives or everything was going to go wrong… But that’s Shepard for you, finding impossible solutions in even worse situations.

I: How accurate do you think the script was?

JH: If you hear the writers tell it, the whole thing is 100% true. The producers say that it is mostly true, but with some artistic license thrown in. Shepard said that it was fairly spot on. Some of the stuff that she did is still classified so we’ll never really know.

I: What do you think?

JH: I think that someone actually got it pretty close. But there are some things that are clearly filled in over gaps in the story we can’t or won’t ever know.

I: Such as?

JH: Some of the events on Noveria. We still can’t be sure what really happened with the Rachni so we had to guess. I think our guesses are pretty on point. Then there are some of the issues with Cerberus and the Alliance and the Council, which will become apparent in the second movie. And the big one is Commander Shepard and Liara T’Soni. *coughs nervously* which I mean I understand, I wouldn’t want to spill my entire love life to a movie production team. But it does leave us with some narrative holes.

I: How was it working with Serlia Tani (who played Liara T’Soni for the films)?

JH: Tani was great, a real professional. I think she really got Liara. I can totally see why Shepard fell so hard for her. *blushes* Uh… next question?

I: Did you ever meet the Commander in person?

JH: We corresponded quite a bit during the filming of all the films. She even dropped by the sets a couple of time. I know people talk about the thousand yard stare, but it is something else to see someone go through. Like in our recreation of the Collector base sets, Shepard just slipped off on her own. I found her a couple of minutes later, just looking at nothing. Other than the few times she’d do that on set I found the Commander to be a nice person. Very willing to help me out in whatever way I needed. She helped talk me through a bunch of the more difficult scenes. I also found out that she’s a big movie nerd. Apparently when she was living on Earth she’d get her hands on old sci-fi films, and I mean old like twentieth century old, and watch them. It gave her this kind of weird optimism about space and aliens and her own future because of this old sense of optimism that the past had when they envisioned us this far in the future. But when she finally got off Earth and things weren’t exactly as good as it was promised, not even close, you can kind of see how that would make a person a bit bitter… *trails off* Anyway the Commander was super enthusiastic about the movie, she would always come to set super enthralled and never wanting to get in the way of anyone. Almost like a kid in a candy store. She was also instrumental in getting most of her old crew, those that were still alive, to meet the actors. I think that really helped the film come together.

I: Do you have anything to say to the people who say these movies are being made too soon? It was barely five years since the war ended when filming started for the first film.

JH: I understand their point of view. No one wants another desperate cash grab like _The Galaxy’s Shepard_ coming out and disgracing everyone who fought in the war. But I think we have a good team here, we want to tell the story with as much respect and reverence that it deserves. Having said that I think now is the perfect time to tell this story again. I mean look at the galaxy, we came together to fight something so incredibly dangerous and life threatening. We did the unthinkable, together. But the old cracks are starting up again. The Krogan and the Salarians are starting to butt heads again. People are arguing with the Council over stupid matters again. I think the galaxy could use a very gentle reminder of what we went through. What we all went through. And hopefully if we remind people about what happened and what everyone alive survived, maybe we can… I don’t know… go back to being friends? That sounds bad, we can edit that out, right?

I: I thought it sounded good.

JH: *mumbling* At least someone thought so.


	2. Shepard: Spectre Premiere

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Commander Shepard on the red carpet for the premiere of the first movie based on her life.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A mostly happy trip down memory lane. Just wait until we get to the sequels.

“Come on Shepard, don’t you want to go out and greet your fans?” Liara asked sitting next to the Commander in the back of the limo.

“You know I was all excited and then we got here. This is the first time I’ve really been out in public since the end…” the Commander trailed off as she looked out the tinted windows at the gathered crowd awaiting the galaxy wide premiere of the first Shepard movie.

“You’ve been all excited about this for months. Let’s go out there, have a fun night out of the house. Besides we got all dressed up, you look beautiful,” Liara told Shepard as she adjusted the former Alliance Commander’s thin tie.

“Not as good as you,” Shepard countered instantly.

“Please, I’m still carrying that extra baby weight.”

“And you’ve never looked better. Are you sure this is ok, shouldn’t we be home with Nezzy?”

“She’s with my father, who I’m sure can’t get into too much trouble in a couple of hours,” Liara said gently. “Now let’s go great your adoring public.”

Shepard leaned over to kiss the asari in the yellow dress, “Our adoring public. You were there beside me the entire time.”

As the Commander reached for the door to step out of the limo, Liara looked down at the floor. “Not the entire time,” she muttered.

The instant the door opened, the number of flashes that permeated the air was like forty thousand flash-bangs had gone off. Shepard was rendered stunned for several seconds.

Liara had appeared beside her and smiled up at the slightly taller Commander. Shepard put an arm around her, and the other she raised in a little wave.

The crowd went wild. Shepard waved at seemingly everyone and smiled like she was a kid in a candy store with the caveat that she could have one of everything.

She tried to answer questions yelled from the crowd. “Who are you wearing?” (“I have no idea!”) “What have you been doing since the war ended?” (“Absolutely nothing!”) “What’s next for you?” (“Probably some champagne.”)

The pair walked the red carpet and the gauntlet of camera flashes, and eventually she spotted Garrus and Tali doing much the same ahead of them. They embraced each other and chatted for a second before Shepard was waved over to the other side of the red carpet by a production assistant she met on the set of the movie.

“Ma’am, if you’d be so kind we’d appreciate it if you gave an interview,” the surprisingly timid salarian said quickly.

“Sure,” Shepard shrugged, feeling kind of drunk off the attention.

“And afterwards we’d ask if you head into the theater for the screening.”

“Not a problem,” Shepard smiled.

“Commander Shepard and Doctor T’Soni, a pleasure to meet you,” said the conventionally attractive entertainment reporter. “How does it feel?”

Shepard smiled and looked around, “Uh… kind of insane. I’m not used to this kind of attention.”

“We heard that you were on set several times during filming. Is that true?”

“Absolutely. I really wanted to see what happens to make a movie, I love them and figured now was much chance to see how one was made.”

“Did you give the actors or the production team any pointers?”

Shepard shrugged. “I did introduce most of the actors to their real world counterparts. And I did try to show Miss Hale how to appropriately hold a weapon. There were a couple of story pointers I gave them.”

“Like what?”

“The entire team seemed to think I had this plan on how things were supposed happen. And that I was somehow more badass than I was actually at the time,” Shepard said with a shrug. “We’ll see if they listened to me.”

“We also heard rumors of some legal disputes at the beginning of the production. Could you elaborate on that at all?”

Shepard shrugged. “The only thing I wanted them to do, besides be as honest as possible, was to promise me that all the opening day profits would go to the Normandy Rebuilding Project.”

“That is the charity you set up, right?”

Shepard blushed, but was given a gentle nudge by Liara who answered the question for the embarrassed Commander, “Yes, it is the charity dedicated to rebuilding everything left in shambles by the Reapers. While the homeworlds of many species faced brutal devastation, we can’t forget the smaller planets and colonies that lost everything. So the Normandy Rebuilding Project spends eighty percent of its proceeds on rebuilding some of the areas that haven’t been publicized as much as Earth or Thessia or Palaven. The rest is being spent on repairing communication networks and the like in some of the emptier places in space.”

“A noble endeavor.”

“We did wind up convincing them to do it, and here we are,” Shepard said.

“Have you seen the film yet Commander?”

Shepard shook her head. “It should be good though.”

“One last question before we let you go: what have you been doing since you retired from the Alliance?”

Shepard broke into a wide grin, and Liara could tell that a joke was coming so she preempted it with, “Don’t you dare.”

“What?” Jane asked, trying to look innocent.

“I know you, I know what you were going to say.”

Shepard grinned and turned back to the reporter and said, “Oh you know, a little bit of this and little bit of that.”

One the word “that” she nudged Liara in a not-so-subtle way.

Liara rolled her eyes said a quick thank you to the reporter before dragging Shepard into the movie theater lobby.

There they were greeted by a server with flutes of champagne, and their friends. Garrus and Tali were there together. Wrex had gotten away from his political and fatherly duties for one night. Joker was hobbling along with the help of the ever patient EDI.

The gang had a brief reunion, even though it hadn’t been that long since they were all together in the same place. Since Shepard had threatened death upon any who didn’t attend Benezia’s baby shower less than a year before.

They only had time to do a couple of toasts and a couple of glasses of champagne before being ushered into the theater for the feature.

The second that the lights went out, Shepard had a silly grin on her face and her eyes were wide with excitement.

During the movie no one laughed louder, or was more entranced than Shepard was. She clapped excitedly when she saw herself, played by someone else, getting her Spectre status. She was on the edge of her seat for the entirety of the Artemis Tau sequence.

“That’s you!” she whispered in Liara’s ear when the scene shifted to the blue sphere the young asari got herself trapped in. Liara blushed in embarrassment. But then she felt Shepard’s permanently calloused hand gripping her own, during the entirety of the Noveria section.

Then Shepard’s hand was gone. And when Liara looked over Shepard was already halfway up the aisle.

And then Liara saw why, the landscape of Virmire dominated the screen.

Shepard didn’t return until well after the scene was over. “All that champagne really goes through me,” she lied in a low whisper.

Liara grabbed the Commander’s hands and gave them a gentle squeeze. Watching her choose Ashley over Kaidan, again was hard for Liara, so she couldn’t even begin to imagine what it would have been like for the Commander to rewatch that.

Then it came time for the trip to Ilos and Liara hid her face in embarrassment at watching herself coming on to Shepard on screen.

“By the goddess,” she whispered.

Shepard leaned over and kissed Liara on the cheek.

“I can’t believe how awkward I was then,” the asari whispered.

“You say awkward, I say adorable. And hot as hell,” Shepard whispered and kissed her cheek again.

Liara turned into the kiss as their on screen counterparts did the same.

 


	3. Director Commentary

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Taken from the Director’s Commentary on Shepard: Survivor Parts 1 & 2 Extended Editions Collector’s Set

[During the opening titles and credit sequences]

**Director Hudson** : Welcome to the director commentary on the extended edition of _Shepard: Survivor Part 1_. I was the director of photography on the first movie, _Shepard: Spectre_. To clear up a lot of the rumors that surrounded the change: I was not trying to steal the position or anything. It was legitimately creative differences between the studio and Casey Johanson, the director of the first film. He wanted to show Shepard’s decision to work with Cerberus at the time and all of her subsequent decisions in a much better light. The studio, and Commander Shepard, wanted it to be honest, to show that Cerberus was as bad then as it was at the end. Someone asked me, and I forget who now, how I would do it, and I said that I probably couldn’t do it in one movie and I would want to show it as a bad decision, but one that had to be made because there was no other choice. In the end that was how I got the job. Shepard and, by extension, the studio thought I was the better fit so that is how I got to direct the next four Shepard movies.

[The destruction of the Normandy SR-1 scene]

**Hudson** : Oh man, this was a challenge. Now usually, movies aren’t filmed in chronological order, it just can’t happen with time for locations and actors’ availability and all the crap that goes into it. But we just so happened to film the first scene first. And we wanted to start with the death of Commander Shepard, and fill in some of the intervening time with partial flashbacks. In some kind of horrific coincidence, we also had the real Commander Shepard on set for the first day, along with her wife, Doctor T’Soni. *long pause as the Normandy SR-1 explodes under Collector attack* Talk about awkward.

[During Shepard’ recruitment of Samara on Illium]

**Hudson** : All of people asked us about Liara. And to be honest we never really had an adequate answer. So we went with what the writers provided for us. We know that Liara recovered Shepard’s body from the Shadow Broker for Cerberus. We also know that Liara was a big time information broker on Illium. We also know that she had a vendetta against the Broker, and that the Broker is very much still alive and continuing to operate. Neither Shepard nor Doctor T’Soni cared to share the information of what happened, so we got this. Liara felt compelled to hunt the Broker, didn’t fully trust the Shepard the returned was the ‘true’ Shepard nor that she would return from the Collectors. As well as a good amount of Commander Shepard not wanting Liara to go with her on a mission she knew she might not come back from. We caught a lot of flak from audience, and more than a few critics, that this didn’t wrap up nice and easy or didn’t provide enough narrative punch, but… *sighs heavily* we don’t really know what happened. And we do get a resolution in the next film. Speaking of which, the reason I wanted to do this in two, rather long movies, was because Shepard has so many people on her team, and she does so much, that I knew that one movie couldn’t give them their just development in a single movie. So the first one I focus mostly on recruitment, introducing the team, getting the audience familiar with them. The next film was all about differentiating the team and showing the cracks in a team of rogues and how Shepard somehow gets them to work together, and then showing her blowing up the base and fighting a Reaper by herself. Because she’s a badass like that. *chuckles softly* That’s the one thing that I get into fights with Commander Shepard over all the time. Every time she’s on set or I call to ask for advice or she sees some advanced edit I get yelled at because she looks “too cool” or “too in control” or, and this one was my favorite, “not shitting my pants at the prospect of a giant human sized Reaper with glowing orange human paste veins of terror”. I always got a kick out of that last one. It isn’t really something that translates well to film though.

 


	4. During the Screening Shepard: Survivor Part 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Liara is forced to confront, again, some of the more difficult decisions in her past.

During the screening of the second Shepard: Survivor film, Shepard looked over to see Liara still hadn’t returned from the bathroom. She had gotten up when on-screen Shepard had left Illium for the last time. Thane and Shepard said goodbye the asari planet for the last time, and there was an awkward forced goodbye between Shepard and Liara.

Seeing Thane pained Shepard, so she got up to see what happened to Liara.

It wasn’t too hard to find her. She was sitting on a bench outside the bathroom, long purple dress falling into puddles at her feet.

She was crying.

“Hey,” Shepard said quietly as she slipped into the seat next to Liara. “What’s wrong?”

Liara didn’t look up. “I should have gone with you.”

For a long, impossible second Shepard didn’t say anything. “Do you mean on Illium, when I was working for Cerberus?”

The asari nodded. “I should have just dropped everything, I wanted to trust it was you. I… I wanted it so badly… Why didn’t I just leave everything and go with you?”

“Liara, honey,” Shepard said as she grabbed her hands and tried to look her in the eyes, but Liara kept turning away. “Don’t you remember why you couldn’t?”

“I was being stupid and jealous and afraid and paranoid and part of me felt like you wouldn’t love me anymore.”

“Holy crap,” Shepard breathed. “Liara, hey, look at me. I don’t blame you for that. I never blamed you for Illium or anything. You were trying to find the guy who wanted to sell me to the Reapers to save his own skin. The same guy who had tortured and imprisoned a friend of yours. As badly as I wanted you to come with me, I was almost better off knowing you’d be alive, you’d be safe. Do you know how many times we… I… almost died?”

“You’re not helping.”

“You were better off not coming. And I knew that you had very important work to do. I had something to fight for, to come back for. That nonsense about me not loving you, I came back from the jaws of death for you, so you can know that there is nothing in this universe that will ever get me to stop loving you.”

Liara sniffed and forced a smile.

Shepard leaned in closer. “Just do me one favor.”

“What?”

“Please don’t take relationship advice from the movie,” Shepard pleaded. “For one they don’t have the whole story. And two, I don’t think I was ever that smooth and charming, nor do I think I ever will be. I’m just kind of a bumbling idiot.”

Liara laughed.

“An attractive bumbling idiot, but still.”

“You’re my attractive bumbling idiot.”

“For eternity,” Shepard leaned in to kiss her. “Now what do you say we watch the credits roll after I make some catastrophic mistakes on screen for the whole galaxy to see?”


	5. Cast Interview with Jane Hale and Serlia Tani

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The end of the film is coming, what do the leads have to say about it?

**Interviewer** : Hello, I’m here with the two leads of Shepard, Jane Hale and Serlia Tani, who star as Commander Shepard and Doctor Liara T’Soni. Welcome ladies.

**Jane Hale** : Hi.

**Serlia Tani** : It is a pleasure to be here.

**Interviewer** : So _Shepard_ is the last of the five _Shepard_ movies, following _Spectre_ , _Survivor Parts 1 and 2_ , and _Savior_. What are you going to miss the most about filming?

**Jane Hale** : Oh man, I’m going to miss the people, the cast, the crew. We’ve been doing this for what… six years now. It is going to be weird not seeing them every day.

**Serlia Tani** : I agree. Although it was a bit strange to have to sit out for the second movie so much. It was like missing your best friend, or family.

**JH** : Yeah I-… we really missed you then.

**ST** : *laughs*

**Interviewer** : Is there anything about the shoots that you won’t miss?

**JH** : The workouts. Holy shit the workouts. I was basically training everyday to keep up with Commander Shepard’s physique. I’m looking forward to not having to do that again. I miss pizza.

**ST** : I’ll miss her physique. For a human Jane here has some great abs.

**JH** : *blushes* Uh… well…

**ST** : I’m only kidding. But I agree. We filmed a war epic. War has lots of fighting, and Shepard and her crew were always in the thick of it. So I won’t be missing the death defying stunt work. I think I might take a break and go back to indie dramas.

**I** : What about you Miss Hale, any plans after the movie is out?

**JH** : Well I hadn’t really thought about it much. *looks at Serlia* I’m thinking I might just go out, enjoy some of those checks from the other four movies.

**ST** : I can help you spend some of that.

**I** : Now that it is all over, what do you think the hardest part of the series to film?

**ST** : Goddess, there are so many to chose from.

**JH** : Leaving Earth. I bawled like an idiot every single time. Do you know how many times we had to redo that scene.

**ST** : *mouths silently* forty six times

**JH** : Or the ending… Just the entire ending…

**ST** : What not even a mention of leaving your wonderful girlfriend behind as you run into certain Reaper Death?

**JH** : I mean… Yeah… That was...Bad, but it wasn’t the hardest thing for me. Because, I mean, I understood why Shepard did it. It was easier knowing that one person she loved most was safe and alive. Sacrificing herself was easy when you were safe.

**ST** : Aw that was sweet. Don’t you think they really did a perfect casting job?

**I** : Yeah, it is hard to imagine anyone else as Commander Shepard at this point.

**JH** : *blushes* Thank you.

**ST** : I mean the hardest part for me was filming Liara’s Gift at the end. It was this sweet, tender moment right before everything goes to hell, one last moment of peace with the person she loves more than anything. Once they told us we got the scene I hid in my trailer for like three hours and just cried.

**JH** : I remember, I practically had to drag you out of there.

**ST** : That you did…

**I** : Overall, how do you think the movie did in capturing Shepard’s story.

*JH and ST share a long look*

**JH** : I think we got as close as we can get while everyone is still alive and the records are still classified.

**ST** : Yeah, I mean there are some things I wouldn’t want on screen that we kind of had to… fill in ourselves.

**I** : Like what?

**ST** : That would be telling. I don’t want to tell anyone, oh this scene didn’t actually happen! Because wouldn’t that just take you right out of the movie.

**I** : For nearly six years, you two have been playing the most high profile couple in history. What was that like?

**ST** : I totally get why Liara is so in love with Shepard. Who wouldn’t be?

**JH** : I don’t know, personally I got a little crush on Liara.

**ST** : I noticed.

**I** : With most movies and actors playing romances, it is a one movie kind of deal. But for you two, you had to carry it through five separate films. Was it easier or more difficult having to keep that up for so long?

**JH** : I don’t know about you Serlia, but I thought it was pretty easy.

**ST** : I agree. We get along great. And like we said, we know why our counterparts love each other so much, so that made our job pretty easy. That and we got to spend time with Liara and Shepard, so it really helped just seeing them being all lovey dovey with each other. It also helps that Jane here is as good a kisser as she is beautiful.

**JH** : You’re not so bad yourself.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> They're totally doing it.


	6. The Final Premiere

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shepard witnesses her actions on screen, the retaking of Earth and the death of David Anderson.

From the first frame of the movie, Shepard was teary eyed. She cried as she left Anderson behind on Earth, she cried as Ashley was almost killed on Mars.

Luckily for the middle part she got a brief reprieve.

But gone was the child-like enthusiasm. She was no longer excited to see herself on the big screen. Shepard’s grip on Liara’s hand was like a vice, like she was scared that if she let it go this whole thing would turn out to be some kind of fever dream.

Then came Tuchanka immediately followed by Rannoch.

Shepard didn’t even look up at the screen. She just cried into Liara’s shoulder at the loss of Mordin followed by Legion’s sacrifice.

The people sitting around them noticed but said nothing. How could they ask _the_ Commander Shepard to not mourn her fallen friends? In fact she wasn’t the only one crying. Liara was biting back her own tears. Tali’s visor was fogged up. Wrex and Grunt’s krogan stoicism was being tested as the sun rose over a genophage free Tuchanka.

But none of it compared to the end of the film: taking back Earth.

If Liara was devastated by Thessia, then it was nothing compared to Shepard being faced with Earth in ruins once again.

Her grip on Liara’s hands tightened as she watched Cortez’s ship going down. Even though she knew he survived, hell he was sitting in the row behind her, she felt that old fear rising again.

Although she did give a sad, forced smile, to Liara when their on-screen personas traded their gift right before the final push.

It was Liara’s turn to weep uncontrollably when Shepard left her behind in the push to beam and the Citadel. It was impossible when it happened, and it was next to impossible to watch then. This time she held onto Shepard for dear life, afraid that she’d lose her once again, even through the fiction on screen.

But everything stopped for Shepard when she saw the broken, bloody Anderson on the screen before her.

The tears couldn’t be stopped now. They fell fast and silent and completely uninterrupted.

“Anderson? We did it sir,” Jane Hale’s Shepard said

“Yes… we did. We both did… It’s… ung… quite a view,” the broken and dying Admiral Anderson said.

The music had stopped, or maybe Shepard just couldn’t hear it anymore.

Jane Hale grunted in pain, her armor was broken, burned, cracked, bloody. “Best seats in the house.”

“God,” Anderson mumbled, “feels like years since… I just sat down.”

“I think you earned a rest.”

“Ever wonder how things could have been different? How our lives could have been different if… this didn’t happen?” Anderson asked Shepard. Then and now she didn’t know how to answer. “I didn’t have a family Shepard, didn’t have children.”

“There’ll be time enough for that,” Hale said at the end the Reaper War.

Anderson laughed weakly. “I… I think that ship has sailed for me. What about you? You ever think about settling down?”

Shepard chuckled. “I like the sound of that. Don’t think I’d be much good at it though.”

As usual, Anderson wouldn’t take any of Shepard’s self-deprecation. “Sure you would. I think you’d make a great mother.”

Hale weakly muttered, “Uh huh.”

“Think about how proud your kids would be… telling everyone their mom is Commander Shepard.” That was Anderson. Always thinking so highly of Commander Shepard.

“I don’t know about that… Not everything I’ve done is something to be proud of,” on screen Shepard saying what real life Shepard always though.

“I’m proud of you… you did good child, you did good.”

Shepard couldn’t take it any more. Hearing those words echo in her mind she ran out of the theater as she heard herself on screen, “Thank you sir. Anderson? Stay with me. We’re almost through this. Anderson?”

Liara followed her almost instantly.

She found Shepard curled up on a bench sobbing, large wracking sobs that shook her entire body.

Liara just sat next to Shepard and put her arms around her.

The Commander never spoke about what happened in the Citadel that day. She didn’t even tell Liara what happened. It was just too painful. The only thing anyone knew was that she went into the beam, and twenty minutes later the Crucible activated and the Reapers all died.

“You ok?” Liara asked unnecessarily.

“They got it right,” Shepard said in between unsteady breaths. “I never told anyone what Anderson told me. But they guessed right.”

“Honey,” Liara said as Shepard shifted her position and wrapped her arms around Liara.

“The last thing Anderson ever said to me was that he was proud of me. But of all the people, I couldn’t save him. He died being proud of me.”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Note 1: I lifted the dialogue straight from the cut scene between femShepard and Anderson in the Crucible. Look it up if you haven't already. I'll be waiting with tissues.  
> Note 2: This was supposed to be the last chapter but there might be an epilogue, maybe. We'll see how bored I am at work today.


End file.
